Until recently, I hardly ever took my own bags to the grocery store. In the past I’d tried to get on board with reusable bags but A)I’d usually forget to bring them and B)when I did I always felt weird about taking one store’s bags to another store, as if the checker at Target would see a Harmon’s logo on my bags and know I had cheated on Target with another grocery store.

And then I got in line behind a terrible bitch. She didn’t do anything to me personally, but she was so mean to the checkers it made me embarrassed on behalf of all the store’s customers. And what she was mean about was bags. When the checker asked “paper or plastic,” she complained that “you shouldn’t even offer plastic bags! They’re illegal in some states, you know!” And proceeded to sourly watch the checker put her two items in a paper bag while she bitched at him about a couple of other things and then tried to get a free copy of the New York Times before storming off. She was so awful it’s almost funny looking back, but at the time all I could think was that anyone really concerned about the environment would just carry her two items in her hands instead of asking for a bag at all.

Or bring a reusable bag. Obviously. The incident got me interested in the whole grocery bag issue once again and I eventually decided it was time to try the reusable bag thing again. I remembered my weirdness about store logo bags, so I started looking online and fell in love with the most stupidly expensive totes ever. I now own five of them.

It’s not totally clear from the photos, but they’re dedicated to various famous books and authors, with famous passages printed on them along with illustrations. The narrow sides are printed to look like the spines of books. There’s Alice in Wonderland, Wind in the Willows, Sherlock Holmes, Dracula, and Jane Eyre. I was tempted by the MacBeth tote and the Call of Cthulhu one, but even at my most impulsive I do have some limits. There’s also a tote for “The Raven” by Edgar Allan Poe but honestly, that’s not even close to my favorite work by Poe and I’m tired of goths latching on to that one poem and pretending it makes them literary. If there was a Hop-Frog tote I’d be all over it but the Raven is way overdone.

I’m not usually a “retail therapy” person but every once in a while I make ridiculous impulse purchases. The good news about this one is that I do love the bags. They’re well made, sturdy and hold a lot. Even after several months they still make me happy every time I use them, and the expense makes me remember to use them almost every time I shop.

I’m not sure what, besides, grocery shopping, made me think of this story today but I was struck by how inspiration can come from the most surprising places. Maybe that bitchy lady really is saving the environment by yelling at grocery checkers. Maybe someday I’ll see her again, and I’ll probably be using my awesome bags when I do. Maybe I’ll yell at her to go get one of her own.